The Hidden Scars: My Childhood of Survival
Almost every day, my mother slapped and beat me until my body was covered in blue bruises. Beyond the physical abuse, she constantly cursed me with cruel, soul-crushing words. "Stupid girl," "useless girl," "you’re a waste of my life," and "I gave birth to you only to serve me" were her daily mantras. She frequently degraded me further by calling me a dog, a bitch, a filthy girl, and even a whore. I was just a little girl who had no idea what that last word meant, so I asked my father about it. Shocked, he demanded to know where I had heard it. I kept quiet, hiding the fact that my mother hurled that insult at me almost every day while he was away at work.
Whenever her friends visited, she would proudly boast to them that I was a child she never wanted. She openly admitted to trying various methods to terminate her pregnancy with me, including taking different kinds of medication. Hearing her speak so callously broke my heart. As I grew older, I wondered where she even got the money for those abortion pills. I eventually discovered a painful truth: she had been secretly stealing the household money my father provided to feed our family.
She used that stolen money to buy delicacies exclusively for herself. Meanwhile, my two brothers and I were forced to eat nothing but plain rice with salt. I often caught her hiding premium food items that I had never even tasted before. To protect her stash, she hid the food deep inside her wardrobe among piles of clothes. She strictly threatened us, saying, “Whoever dares to touch or eat anything from this cupboard will die.”
Uncovering the Truth
The endless cruelty eventually drove me to question my own existence. One day, I looked at my father and asked, “Whose daughter am I really? Why is Mom so cruel to me?” My question finally forced him to reveal the dark reality. He admitted that my mother was truly wicked and heartless. He confessed that he had wanted to leave her long ago, but stayed solely to protect and shield me. He then made a solemn promise: he would do whatever it took to fund my education through college so I could finally escape her control.
My father then shared the exact moment he realized how evil she truly was. Years ago, his elderly grandmother had suffered a severe fall inside her bedroom. My mother witnessed the accident but refused to help. Instead, she deliberately locked the bedroom door from the outside, leaving the old woman to die helpless in that room. Horrified by her malice, my father immediately sent her back to her parents. At that time, only my eldest brother was a toddler; my second brother and I were not yet born.
Unwilling to accept the rejection, my mother's parents took her to a local sorcerer to implant a diamond charm (susuk) into her forehead. Once the spell took effect, they traveled to my father’s house in another town to plead for her return. Stripped of all logic and under the charm's influence, my father foolishly welcomed her back. That decision led to the births of my second brother and myself. Although she swore she would change her ways, she never kept her word. From that point onward, his love for her was completely dead. Today, he lives only with the deep regret of marrying the wrong woman, often reminding me that out of the four women who wanted to marry him in his youth, choosing my mother was the greatest mistake of his life.
Tidak ada komentar :
Posting Komentar
Catatan: Hanya anggota dari blog ini yang dapat mengirim komentar.